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Posted

Whats with all the power cuts in St James (and beyond for all I know)? It went off last night about 11pm for 10-15 minutes, stuttered back on, went off, came on, went off and finally got back to normal about midnight. Street lights out as well. It's just gone off briefly again about 15 minutes ago. Plays havoc with the computers!

Posted

That'll be the work of all the promiscuous strumpets who, for reasons unknown and as yet to be fully addressed and discussed, are now in possession of a vast array of sex toys. Apparently St.James is a hotspot for this new slide into depravity.

Basically, with or without an 'e', the humming, dimming of lights and even the ceasation of your domestic voltage is all the result of women who are relentlessly switching on their devices at the exact same time in search of gratification.

Go knocking on doors. Ask them. 'If your wife is upstairs using her vibrator could she please stop. Im trying to boil an egg'.

Posted

No Bobby you are incorrect.

I have it on good authority that Western Power have concluded that as the vast majority of the residents in St James/Bartonsham are all hippies they can easily cope with candle power thus saving decent electricity for the rest of us!!!!!

Posted

There was me thinking that the soundtrack to a typical St James Saturday was floor sanders whirring away, when it's been something far more intimate all along! Strumpets! No wonder the Vollie is always full of blokes!

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